The Clock Ticks On

Just musing on the many birthday wishes, gifts and presence. Yes, that is not a typo - I mean presence, not presents. At times presence (just being there) outweighs presents. It is by far the best birthday I've celebrated so far (oh, there was no party - but I still celebrated). Its great to know that my life counts, to be in pursuit of a vision and to have a purpose.  Someone told me that youth is a blunder, manhood a struggle and old age a regret. Nothing could be further from the truth. It was never meant to be this way. That is NOT my life.

Anyway to the day itself - the select day even in the season. The day before my birthday we are having tea with mum and I tell her,

"hey mum, remember tomorrow is my birthday..."

"is that so?" she asks, "is that when you were born?"

I paused. I realized I actually DON’T KNOW when I was born. She really is the one who knows when I was born. I only believe what she tells me.

Doesn’t this fill you with greater appreciation for your mum? I mean, today I'm more learned than she is - but there are some things only she knows for sure, and I will never know. She could tell it to me, but I will never have the experience. How it felt to carry me for nine months. How was the day she carried me from the maternity? Was it rainy? What was the color of the baby shawl? Was it plain or flowered? She will always be mum - no matter how old, rich, or powerful I become. For I would never get here without her.

So goes with our leaders. Note: I don’t mean POLITICIANS. I mean leaders. People who have led us along the way. People who went before us and paved the way for us. Like my nursery school teacher. She taught me the alphabet. Well, today I'm fluent in English, I can write, fill crosswords and the codeword, but where would I be except for the alphabet? So as one wise man said, "if we see far, it is because we stand on the shoulders of those who have gone before us." and there are numerous examples. People who have invested in us and we became better than them, or we just became better; maybe we became more visible than they are; we should always honor them.

Different people offered different gifts (key word is offered - receiving the gift is up to me). As the old adage goes, it’s the thought that counts. I wont discuss that, but will discuss one gift. My sister bought me a watch. I lack the proper words for it but in slang, "I was so jazzed". I got thinking how I would "revenge" - get back at her; repay her. I can get her a shoe or some cake - I know she loves both. The cake she will eat and that's it. The shoe she can wear - maybe once a week (she has so many other pairs, I don’t understand why she still loves shoes). Or maybe she can wear it on special occasions. But "her" watch, I WILL ALWAYS HAVE WITH ME.

This caused me to think deeply. What impact do I have on people? Is it a sweet but momentary impact that will only remain in the recesses of their minds but not be carried wherever they go? (like the cake). Is it an occasional impact only when we meet? (like the shoe worn on special occasions). Or is it a lasting impact that becomes embedded in all that their hands seek to do? (like the watch now worn on my wrist). I desire the latter.

I could keep writing. Of how the same words "Happy Birthday" coming from different people mean different things - not more or less - but different. Of how each friendship and relationship is unique. Of the beauty of simplicity, the small things that matter; of wanting what you have not having what you want; of the flowers that we never notice along the path coz we never take the time to…… but I will pen off here…and let the music play on…. Happy Birthday to me…….