Can I tie a tie?

Early one morning on my way to work I was approached by a fine looking young man.

"Excuse me," he said, "Can I ask you a favor?"

"Yes", I answered.

"I need to put on a tie." He continued. "The only problem is that I don't know how to tie a tie. Will you please do it for me?"

"Yes I can," I answered.

With that, he went to the nearest stall and bought a tie, which he gave to me to tie for him. For some reason I felt like there was something funny about this whole episode. I tried to look around for any hidden cameras - I couldn't see any. It didn't help that the ladies around the stalls were gazing at us the whole time. It only increased my suspicion.

After the first attempt, the tie was shorter than what I thought was ideal, so I re-did it. All in all, I ended up tying it in less time than I thought I would. I was on my way to work, but not without some thoughts:

1. The first reflection was on the society we have become. What made me so suspicious? Is it not the many pranks one expects in the city? This makes me miss village life. In the village, we were not suspicious of each other. We were like one big family.
2. Speaking of family, where does one learn to tie a tie? Where does one learn to be a man? Did this young man who spoke to me have a father? Why didn't his father teach him to tie a tie? Maybe his father too didn't know how to tie a tie. I'm challenged to ensure I teach my son how to "tie a tie", whatever that will entail. That way, he will never be lost in the city with a tie that is not tied.
3. I believe the reason why the young man came to me was because he saw me in a tie. This may be the biggest lesson in all: I can only lead men to where I have been. I can only offer that which I have, I can only make somebody that which I am. This is a call for continuous personal development, that I may be of use to those after me.
4. For one to get help, they must admit helplessness. To benefit from one more skilled, talented, or wiser than me, I must humble myself and submit. How many times have we missed on the resources locked up in people because pride got in the way; because we thought of ourselves as better than they were? Haughtiness and pride only hinder growth; and as the wise men quipped, pride comes before a fall.
5. Finally; it is sad that I only tied the tie for him. Who will tie for him tomorrow? Or the day after? The lesson for me is to focus not just on the result, but to learn the process. As the old adage goes, give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish, you feed him for a lifetime. Maybe next time I will do it better - not by doing it so well, but by training the young man how to do it.

Clearly, there is more to tying a tie than merely following the steps.